‘She called me a monster’: This Reddit user's ex-wife remarried, had more kids — then sought a 430% increase in child support to help her ‘struggling’ family. Is he right to say no?

Boundaries versus financial obligation

Establishing financial boundaries post-divorce can be a delicate but necessary evil — especially when the line between required support and secondary expenses becomes blurred. The Reddit user explained the additional requests his ex extended to her blended family — a responsibility he firmly believes shouldn’t fall on him.

“This happens even when our children are in my home. I always say no. I have told my ex that I am not responsible for supporting her other children and will never provide for them financially,” the user wrote.

Raising a child is a significant financial commitment, with the average cost projected at approximately $237,482 over 18 years, according to LendingTree. In 2021, U.S. parents received $20.2 billion in child support, averaging $441 per month, according to the U.S. Census Bureau.

So while the Reddit user notes that he is financially stable, he still has to provide for two children on a single income, recognizing the challenges of balancing his financial stability and the demands of raising two children.

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Financial stability after divorce

In blended families, financial obligations after divorce can become complicated with expectations sometimes exceeding biological children.

Ros Bever is a family and divorce lawyer with the U.K. firm Irwin Mitchell. Although he’s overseas, the issues facing parents regarding child support are similar between the U.S. and the U.K.

“What this latest research shows is that the impact on children and the financial aspects of supporting their children post-divorce is front and center of parents’ minds,” Bever wrote for the Irwin Mitchell blog.

But for Commercial-Formal310, his financial interests were clear: his commitment lies with his two biological children. He stood his ground even when his ex-wife asked him to send gifts for her stepchild, who has a birthday close to their daughter’s.

“While my ex's stepchild didn't get much and had no party (they could not afford one),” he wrote. “I had been asked twice to send some gifts for the other child.”

U.S. Census Bureau data shows that 44% of parents with full custody face inconsistent child support, underscoring the challenges that many parents encounter in simply meeting their obligations.

While this Commercial-Formal310 user declined to financially support his ex-wife's new family, he remains fully committed to his children.